3. Always give second chances. To yourself and those around you.

I made a mistake. To avoid making the same mistake I shall avoid getting involved in the same activity. Eg. I was chosen to lead a team. I failed miserably. I shall never take up leadership roles again.

Not exactly the best kind of decision to make.

He/She hurt me. I can forgive her but I am not going to try to go back to how things were. We cannot be the way we were before. I forgive her but doesn’t mean that I still trust her.

Not very right.

She judged me and never gave me a chance to explain myself. The misunderstanding is not my fault. It’s hers. Why should I do something to change things? If anyone should take actions, it’s her.

Not very right either.


Sometimes, we can be so hard on ourselves and those around us. We set high standards for others thinking that we, ourselves, are of quite high a standard.

I’ve learnt how much of difference second chances can make. I’ve learnt the amazing relationships I can form giving second chances to others. I’ve learnt that second chances give me a myriad of possibilities in life, allowing me to have a life that is free and not completely predictable. I’ve learnt that giving second chances, especially to myself enables me to perform to greater heights, achieving greater things.

I lost 2 people dear to me in the last week. I guess, it reminds me that life is REALLY fragile. Live like there is no tomorrow...

If tomorrow never comes
by Norma Cornett Marek (1989)


If I knew it would be the last time that I'd see you fall asleep,
I would tuck you in more tightly, and pray the Lord your soul to keep.
If I knew it would be the last time that I'd see you walk out the door,
I would give you a hug and kiss, and call you back for just one more.

If I knew it would be the last time I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,
I would tape each word and action, and play them back throughout my days
If I knew it would be the last time, I would spare an extra minute or two,
To stop and say "I love you," instead of assuming you know I do.

So, just in case tomorrow never comes, and today is all I get,
I'd like to say how much I love you, and I hope we never will forget.
Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, young or old alike,
And today may be the last chance you get to hold your loved one tight.

So, if you're waiting for tomorrow, why not do it today?
For if tomorrow never comes, you'll surely regret the day
That you didn't take that extra time for a smile, a hug, or a kiss,
And you were too busy to grant someone, what turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today, and whisper in their ear,
That you love them very much, and you'll always hold them dear.
Take time to say "I'm sorry," "Please forgive me," "thank you" or "it's okay".
And if tomorrow never comes, you'll have no regrets about today.



P.s If you loved this, then you would definitely enjoy Nickelback's 'If today was your last day'.
Agnes, thanks for introducing this song to me. Never heard of it until i saw it in your blog.

1. Grab opportunities and dare to take risks

Seems like such a simple thing and that many of us shouldn't be struggling to do this. Unfortunately for me and for many of us out there, we struggled and may still do. Very often, we get pulled back by so-called elements of 'realism' that we spend too much time thinking and weighing on the whether it is possible, whether it is worth it, whether it should be done. Everytime an opportunity presents itself to us, a cynical voice in us may tell us that it is not do-able, it is not in our nature, there are too many risks involved. We can do amazing things once we've learnt to shut that voice. There are risks to everything. Taking a step out of the house has a lot of risk. Weighing risks are important but allowing the fear of risks to conquer us and pull us back from living life the best possible way is not right.

Now, I am not saying you should go ahead and have sex with your partner without fearing getting pregnant. I am saying that you shouldn't stop yourself from, for eg, singing on stage (especially if you've got an amazing voice) just because there are possibilities of failing.

I know I let opportunities go because of fears and risks. My life was always executed with precision after carefully weighing possibilities and risks. I've learnt that they stop you from living the best kind of life you can.

Dream big! Seriously. They never let you down. :)


2. Be open to change. Embrace novelty.

Be it a change in a friend's character, or your position on certain issues. Be it rejection or changes in the dynamics of a relationship. Be it way of doing things or expectations from people. Be it a change in circumstances or path of life. I have learnt that the only constant thing in life is change. And embracing change gives us so much colour and definitely success in life. Whenever change comes, welcome it, embrace it and work with it. Nothing will go wrong when things change. Perhaps that has always been one of our biggest fears. That with change and therefore our inability to see into the future mean, we may fail to prepare and therefore we prepare to fail. That if we do not know how things might work, we will not be able to perform well.

Not true!

Change isn't as scary as we may have perceived it to be. Not knowing what is ahead of us doesn't mean that we are going to fail because we are not prepared. What matters most is embracing the change and making the best out of it. Whatever comes, let it come. Take it by the horns and maneuver it as our life is ours entirely.

Things will definitely turn out just as perfectly. I'm not just saying this. I know for a fact that this is true.


.....to be continued.....



p.s It is possible that the child in the dream from my previous post is representative of God in my life. The only person who understands and sees through me without me having to explain myself. The only person who would hold on to me and give me the ultimate joy. I guess, in my eyes, He's the one who is filled with wisdom, compassion and is still enveloped with innocence. Just like the child.

I had an amazing dream last night. Trying to capture into words, the emotions I felt and the beauty of the situation that I was in seems to be quite a feat.

In my dream, I was in love with a man who I probably cannot be with. He had a child from his previous relationship (I don’t know if they were married) and he was involved with another woman at the time.

No, that is not the beautiful part.

Well, the interesting part came when the woman he was with previously did not want his child and wanted him to be responsible for the child. So, this man (I don’t know who he is) agreed to take the child and care for him. Unfortunately, he didn’t know how on earth he was going to take care of a child when he struggles even to take care of his own self and his girlfriend.

See, that where I came in. Being his good/close friend (truly resembles my real life situations. I’m always the friend, who’s in love with her best friend, who’s in love with some other hot chick. Drama? Yes!), I was more than happy to help him take care of his son to be exact until he gets used to the whole responsibility. Apart from helping him, I was truly and genuinely ecstatic about seeing the son of the man I love. Well, he may not be mine, but I was still so happy to know that I was about to meet the ‘little’ him.

And I still remember vividly how I felt when I first laid eyes on the boy. Heavenly. No other word could describe the moment but heavenly. He was the cutest, sweetest, most beautiful, lovely child I have ever seen. There was so much innocence and simplicity in that face and he smiled from his heart, with no worries and no inhibitions. The moment was simply magical. The moment I laid my eyes on him, I felt like he was mine. Entirely mine.

The child had nothing to do with me. He belonged to the man who didn’t love me. But I loved the child, even when I knew nothing about him. He owned my heart even when he was not technically mine.

I remember taking him up and holding him close to me and wishing that I could spend the rest of my life caring for him.

He was about 3 years old in my dream and he had the brightest mind. His opinions were simple and yet so honest. It was as if he could see through people and know their true intentions. It was as if he could feel what was in them and reciprocate it equally.

I could remember that he clung on to me because he liked me for some weird reason. I remember how he instantly knew how much I loved his father, although his father was clueless. And maybe I was biased, but he also felt that his father was much more comfortable with me than his own girlfriend.

I remember him complaining about wanting to poop and I how took him to the washroom and took care of the whole deal without feeling any kind of disgust. All I saw was his beautiful soul. I loved him.

The next thing I know was that the bad guys were trying to kill me and the child and I remember thinking that I would do anything to save that child’s life. Give mine, if necessary.

Then, I woke up.

I couldn’t believe that I dreamt such a thing. I am only 22 years old and there I was dreaming about caring for a child. It felt so adult. So weird.

At the end of the day, what I learned about myself is that I would love to be a mother and I would love even to be a single mother. That it wouldn’t bother me even a bit if the child was not biologically mine because I would connect to him like his was completely mine. I would love him with everything I had.

I am happy to have felt something so beautiful in just a dream..

After the kind of friendship we've shared, it hurts me to see that we seem to be strangers to each other today.

I am perplexed by how much things have changed.

I look at who we were to each other before and who we are to each other today.

We do not hold on because we do not think it's worth it?

Sometimes, even if you no longer know the person the way you used to, even if you no longer talk, even if you no longer see them and may not even remember how their voice sounds like, you still cannot help but smile widely, happily and genuinely when you hear how well, how happy, how beautiful their life is right now.

Over the past few years, some friends from the past are no longer as close as they used to be. I haven’t seen them in ages, haven’t talked to them in ages because I am such a failure at keeping in touch but I am so happy to see where they are today. It never fails to amaze me the kind of persons we have become today. From who we were to who we are today. Everybody has been on a different journey and yet, everybody has been equally mind-blowing. It was privilege knowing you guys.

Temme Lee

Lee-Lim Ai Ping

Janice Cheng

Irene Ooi

Kumatha

Zaharah

Nabila

Rashidah

Aishah

Jonathan Yap

Benedict Justin

Christina Mary

Olivia Scully

Grace Ooi


It’s been an amazing journey and thank you for inspiring me in ways small or big to just chase my dreams and dare to be me, just the way I am.